Brattleboro Adventure – the Auckland Edition
In which we find ourselves in another part of the world
For the last hundred years or so, this clock has helped everybody in Brattleboro get where they need to be, when they need to be there.
Although I applaud the use of a coordinating green, I am concerned to see this landmark apparently held together with duct tape this week.
Not even duct tape is going to help this poor bastard.
To add insult to injury, later on they gave him a parking ticket.
If you own a Saab in VT, then everything is a political statement… Not fixing the headlight is a cri de coeur against the insurance-bodywork complex, and using green duct tape proclaims your solidarity with oppressed hemp growers.
In Vermont we prefer the simplicity of classic silver duct tape for window repair.
In Vermont, it’s OK to use duct tape to keep the snow out of your favorite shoes that you won’t throw away.
If you’re an international business traveler, it’s ok to hold your suitcase together with duct tape.
In Brattleboro, it’s okay to display your entire collection of black duct tape on your car.
In Brattleboro it’s more than ok for your dear friends to wrap your 24th anniversary present with festive duct tape, as long as they also reuse the number from their own 25th anniversary party.
Cuts to the Cold War Maintenance Budget have made it necessary to repair the hotline with duct tape. The Lieutenant Colonel who decided on bacon duct tape was reprimanded.
In Brattleboro you get extra points for fixing your truck with both plywood AND duct tape, and even more points for echoing those super-fly factory upgrade portholes in your repair job.
In Maine, it’s ok to fix your 12-pack with duct tape.
Unashamed
It’s more than OK to let your inner fabulous out with pink duct tape when your hand-me-down LeSabre springs a headlight.
If you can keep your 20-year-old Kia Sportage convertible running at all, it’s ok to gradually replace the rear window with duct tape.
Even if your minivan has lasted way past its normal shelf life, it’s okay to liven things up with a two-tone duct tape treatment.
Brattleboro Adventure – the Auckland Edition 